For those of you who didn't know, Mr Slurpees and Murder himself has been back in town for awhile. He put this post up after taking a stroll downtown:
"... empty storefront. One of the top twenty arenas in the entire world, and nobody can put together a business plan for prominent adjacent storefront."
It has all sorts of win. Check it out.
Monday, November 9, 2009
Sunday, November 8, 2009
"There's no news in this thing"
So I'm at work, sipping on my coffee and watching this very intense, fast-paced Manchester-Chelsea game.
My co-worker has a copy of On7, picked up from downstairs in our giant free-package they drop off every morning. He's about 25, flipping through On7, page after page. I'm watching him...consume this product, err, "consume," when he gets mostly through it he flips it over in disgust and says:
"What is this thing, man? There's no news in this thing."
He then flipped through the whole front of the "newspaper" and arrived at the sports section, exclaiming that there was nothing worth reading, that he wasn't going to read 5 articles on the Bombers, the lack of NFL coverage, the obligatory "who gives a fuck about Bishop's debts, that's not news" comment, and then something like "who cares how much Jay-Z tips?"
In other news....
Google has changed their logo every day to a different Sesame Street character to commemorate their anniversary!
My co-worker has a copy of On7, picked up from downstairs in our giant free-package they drop off every morning. He's about 25, flipping through On7, page after page. I'm watching him...consume this product, err, "consume," when he gets mostly through it he flips it over in disgust and says:
"What is this thing, man? There's no news in this thing."
He then flipped through the whole front of the "newspaper" and arrived at the sports section, exclaiming that there was nothing worth reading, that he wasn't going to read 5 articles on the Bombers, the lack of NFL coverage, the obligatory "who gives a fuck about Bishop's debts, that's not news" comment, and then something like "who cares how much Jay-Z tips?"
In other news....
Google has changed their logo every day to a different Sesame Street character to commemorate their anniversary!
Wednesday, November 4, 2009
I bestow upon you, permission
This from Kives' article about the Winnipeg Square Parkade:
The committee also voted to prevent the city from spending any cash from the sale until next spring, when the Winnipeg Parking Authority completes a downtown parking strategy that's expected to call for the construction of more parkades.
WEEEELL then.
If the Winnipeg Parking Authority says we need more parkades, then we'll build them right? That just gives councillors PERMISSION to rubber-stamp the demolition of our downtown for parking spots.
Does NOBODY...and I mean...NOBODY understand that parkades are exactly what Winnipeggers hate? When they complain about no parking and parking is too expensive, it doesn't matter how many parkades we have. Because parkades are invisible to people. It costs more than parking does on the street.
The WPA is now my most hated entity in town. Their report might say there isn't enough parking downtown, or whatever it ends up saying. Am I holding my breath that they suggest we build parkades on already-existing surface lots? Heeeell no. What it will NOT do is take into account the economic viability of keeping as many buildings downtown around as we can.
If anybody wants to save downtown, and by "anybody" I mean, "anybody in City Hall," then you have to abandon this pathetic parking-strategy approach.
The committee also voted to prevent the city from spending any cash from the sale until next spring, when the Winnipeg Parking Authority completes a downtown parking strategy that's expected to call for the construction of more parkades.
WEEEELL then.
If the Winnipeg Parking Authority says we need more parkades, then we'll build them right? That just gives councillors PERMISSION to rubber-stamp the demolition of our downtown for parking spots.
Does NOBODY...and I mean...NOBODY understand that parkades are exactly what Winnipeggers hate? When they complain about no parking and parking is too expensive, it doesn't matter how many parkades we have. Because parkades are invisible to people. It costs more than parking does on the street.
The WPA is now my most hated entity in town. Their report might say there isn't enough parking downtown, or whatever it ends up saying. Am I holding my breath that they suggest we build parkades on already-existing surface lots? Heeeell no. What it will NOT do is take into account the economic viability of keeping as many buildings downtown around as we can.
If anybody wants to save downtown, and by "anybody" I mean, "anybody in City Hall," then you have to abandon this pathetic parking-strategy approach.
Sunday, November 1, 2009
Case in point: Why On7 and print news lose to smartphone apps
As I type this, the Bomber-Alouettes game is coming to it's closing seconds.
Instead of waiting until tomorrow morning to read analysis and Ed Tait/Randy Turner articles, one could have them as soon as they have submitted them.
On demand. Directly to their phone, anyone with "sports" or "Bomber coverage" checked off on their RSS feeds or application options, would get updated scores, analysis, pre-game, post-game, speculation and inside dirt. As soon as it happens.
On-demand. We live in an instantaneous world, with access to the internet everywhere. A world where a blogger can text live scores from his phone to his Twitter page.
That just makes waiting until sunday to read 24 pages of sports analysis seem soooo, sooo, so unbelieveably lame.
Instead of waiting until tomorrow morning to read analysis and Ed Tait/Randy Turner articles, one could have them as soon as they have submitted them.
On demand. Directly to their phone, anyone with "sports" or "Bomber coverage" checked off on their RSS feeds or application options, would get updated scores, analysis, pre-game, post-game, speculation and inside dirt. As soon as it happens.
On-demand. We live in an instantaneous world, with access to the internet everywhere. A world where a blogger can text live scores from his phone to his Twitter page.
That just makes waiting until sunday to read 24 pages of sports analysis seem soooo, sooo, so unbelieveably lame.
Today marks the last time ever I will pay for On7
Oh yeah, this is sure to get me on that list of FreeP-approved blogs.
Besides Frogger and Kenton who have already made great points, I'm seriously wondering about this 18-35 demographic target. Are they serious? Let's look through today's On7 and find out how obsolete it is to people my age.
In case the geniouses who were at whichever FreeP board meeting this came out of weren't aware, a majority of your target demographic have these wonderful contraptions called "smartphones." And surely, everybody who is in junior high school right this moment, by the time they graduate, will have such a phone. These phones make internet access constant and your news consumerism potentially constant.
So I'm flipping through this thing I got, it's....I mean, what is this, honestly. The front page boasts "24 pages of sports coverage." I don't give a crap. The front story of the sports? The Yanks beat the Phillies! PUH-LEAZE! Here's 24 pages of newsprint you can save yourself: all that ADD stuff you hear about us young'uns have because of our electronic screens? It's true. I need to know who won, within hours after it happened.
So I'm going to the gas station to buy this thing because....I want to read Ed Tait's Bomber coverage? To read Randy turner's article on how much the Leafs suck? Other than Bomber coverage,there's no reason to read this, there's no way you can out-scoop the internet on hockey or on any other sport. I'm sorry. Darren Dredger's twitter feed for one day trumps your newspaper's hockey coverage for an entire week.
Page 10.
7 things I might have missed this week? First of all, #1 is how Mickey D's isn't going to be in Iceland anymore. Sorry to burst On7's bubble, but this was the number one most read story on the BBC for an entire day. It's also the perfect kind of story to pollute other news pages such as Yahoo, MSN, and Google news reader.
So thus far it seems the only thing I've bought this for was Bartley Kives' weekly column.
The last half of this thing, whatever it is, is like celebrity and talk show gossip. I have to make an effort to avoid this shit on my daily romp through the internet. I don't need to see it anymore. It's not important, it's not news, and, really, Sarah Palin was running for VP and lost. Why do people care what she and her obviously fucked-up family affairs are up to? Is the FreeP and On7 a purveyor of news, or crap?
'Cause there's a lot of news out there that's a day old already that On7 doesn't bother to include. Sarah Palin and McDick's in Iceland garner more news space than real stories, such as the war (yeah we're in a war remember?), or the Middle East in general, or environmental things. I hear them kids are hep to the jive on the green stuff.
Here's a marketing strategy for you, FreeP people. If you want to target the young'uns, if you want to stay relevant, if you want to make yourselves seem like you matter, stop with this print shit. Develop an iPhone app already. One where you can choose which sections you want to follow, which stories you want to read. You check off a section, you get the RSS feed update strait to your phone.
This is a world of on-demand, 24-7, not just on 7. You don't have to set the VCR anymore to watch a TV program, you don't even have to wait for the sports channel to show the instant replay. I don't have to wait for email, for sports updates, I didn't need to read a newspaper to learn that Michael Jackson died and I don't have to read one to find out what time the movies play at.
The fact that they only think they can sell 35 000 of these things to a city of 700 000 should send a message. Not only is your industry dying, but you seem to be taking every possible step to ensure that you remain hopelessly irrelevant.
Besides Frogger and Kenton who have already made great points, I'm seriously wondering about this 18-35 demographic target. Are they serious? Let's look through today's On7 and find out how obsolete it is to people my age.
In case the geniouses who were at whichever FreeP board meeting this came out of weren't aware, a majority of your target demographic have these wonderful contraptions called "smartphones." And surely, everybody who is in junior high school right this moment, by the time they graduate, will have such a phone. These phones make internet access constant and your news consumerism potentially constant.
So I'm flipping through this thing I got, it's....I mean, what is this, honestly. The front page boasts "24 pages of sports coverage." I don't give a crap. The front story of the sports? The Yanks beat the Phillies! PUH-LEAZE! Here's 24 pages of newsprint you can save yourself: all that ADD stuff you hear about us young'uns have because of our electronic screens? It's true. I need to know who won, within hours after it happened.
So I'm going to the gas station to buy this thing because....I want to read Ed Tait's Bomber coverage? To read Randy turner's article on how much the Leafs suck? Other than Bomber coverage,there's no reason to read this, there's no way you can out-scoop the internet on hockey or on any other sport. I'm sorry. Darren Dredger's twitter feed for one day trumps your newspaper's hockey coverage for an entire week.
Page 10.
7 things I might have missed this week? First of all, #1 is how Mickey D's isn't going to be in Iceland anymore. Sorry to burst On7's bubble, but this was the number one most read story on the BBC for an entire day. It's also the perfect kind of story to pollute other news pages such as Yahoo, MSN, and Google news reader.
So thus far it seems the only thing I've bought this for was Bartley Kives' weekly column.
The last half of this thing, whatever it is, is like celebrity and talk show gossip. I have to make an effort to avoid this shit on my daily romp through the internet. I don't need to see it anymore. It's not important, it's not news, and, really, Sarah Palin was running for VP and lost. Why do people care what she and her obviously fucked-up family affairs are up to? Is the FreeP and On7 a purveyor of news, or crap?
'Cause there's a lot of news out there that's a day old already that On7 doesn't bother to include. Sarah Palin and McDick's in Iceland garner more news space than real stories, such as the war (yeah we're in a war remember?), or the Middle East in general, or environmental things. I hear them kids are hep to the jive on the green stuff.
Here's a marketing strategy for you, FreeP people. If you want to target the young'uns, if you want to stay relevant, if you want to make yourselves seem like you matter, stop with this print shit. Develop an iPhone app already. One where you can choose which sections you want to follow, which stories you want to read. You check off a section, you get the RSS feed update strait to your phone.
This is a world of on-demand, 24-7, not just on 7. You don't have to set the VCR anymore to watch a TV program, you don't even have to wait for the sports channel to show the instant replay. I don't have to wait for email, for sports updates, I didn't need to read a newspaper to learn that Michael Jackson died and I don't have to read one to find out what time the movies play at.
The fact that they only think they can sell 35 000 of these things to a city of 700 000 should send a message. Not only is your industry dying, but you seem to be taking every possible step to ensure that you remain hopelessly irrelevant.
Saturday, October 31, 2009
Novel Writing Month
I would just like to tell people that I will be participating in NaNoWriMo, or National Novel Writing Month, along with my friend Matt.
This is probably more of a post for any RRC CreComm students who may be reading my site here and might be interested.
The goal is to crank out a novel in one month, of a minimum 50 000 words. The goal is for quantity and for completion of a project, to avoid procrastination. Quality and editing is of less importance. As the website says, the "kamikaze" approach brought upon by the deadline forces you to just write, instead of worrying about writing well.
About 1/6th of the registered participants last year completed their projects.
And what do you know, Winnipeg, yes humble little Winnipeg, is ranked as the 44th city for visits to the NaNoWriMo site.
This is probably more of a post for any RRC CreComm students who may be reading my site here and might be interested.
The goal is to crank out a novel in one month, of a minimum 50 000 words. The goal is for quantity and for completion of a project, to avoid procrastination. Quality and editing is of less importance. As the website says, the "kamikaze" approach brought upon by the deadline forces you to just write, instead of worrying about writing well.
About 1/6th of the registered participants last year completed their projects.
And what do you know, Winnipeg, yes humble little Winnipeg, is ranked as the 44th city for visits to the NaNoWriMo site.
Friday, October 30, 2009
Parking, parking, parking, get'yer parking heeeee-ere!
What is it with this town and parking? Jeebus already!
Let's look at the long, long, loooong list of W-T-F's with regards to parking that have come up in, oh, I'm not sure, the last year or so?
1. City? (This will be a theme, I'm telling you right now) decides there is not enough parking downtown. Allows demolition of otherwise decent buildings for construction of brand new parkades.
2. Despite the apparent more-than-high demand for parking downtown, they are considering selling a parkade. Who will get this parkade and what they will do with it, is unknown. However, if parking is in more-than-high demand, there should be a lineup of businesspeoples waiting to buy it and pour money in to fix it, shouldn't there? There's money in them-thar' parkin' garages.
3. Winnipeg Parking Authority? Arbitrarily places parking metres all over the fuckin place.
4. WPA? Changes parking hours in strange locations and charges for saturday parking. Winnipeg collectively mutters "...you bastards."
5. The City? Cries and cries about lack of parking downtown. People? complain about lack of parking downtown.
6. People? Complain about the price of parking in Winnipeg. Combined with the City's? claim there is high demand and low supply, Ontario firm moves in to aquirre a parkade in anticipation of capitalizing on a potentially growing parking market.
7. Pie-in-the-sky idea for apartments at the Forks is floated. Graham at Progressive Winnipeg likes this idea. Winnipeg cries foul en masse, wherever will we park?!
8. David Asper announces Stadium Plan at the U of M. Winnipeg cries foul, wherever will we park?!
9. University students complain about lack of parking in last week's Manitoban. The University must do more! Conveniently and ignorantly omitting the fact that more and more students are enrolled every year, invariably, there will be more student vehicles on campus every year. No shit, Sherlock.
10. Winnipeg is without a world-class parking structure. No WONDER we have parking issues.
* * *
Now....seriously. The "?"'s I placed are indeed, just that, ???
WHO decided there wasn't enough parking downtown? I haven't heard any reports, some councillors seem hell-bent on ensuring every single building downtown gets knocked down for a parkade. WHO decided? Nobody will admit to it. Where did this mantra come from exactly? It's like urban myth. You think people in Scotland really believe there's a Loch Ness?
Did the WPA really give the go-ahead to put up all those new parking metres? WHO decided to do that? Nobody knows! Is there a GHOST somewhere in the beauracracy or what? Is there a Minister of Parking in this city nobody knows about?
Since everybody complains about parking downtown, it MUST be true. Therefore we should welcome with open arms, new parking metres and parkades, right?
Except that we don't. That much is blatantly obvious. The best example? Saturday parking. WHO decided to do that? Oh, "they" ran out of proper signage, did they? Well WHO DECIDED it was okay? NOBODY KNOWS! WHO decided it was okay to collect money for saturdays? WHERE did this money go? How come NOBODY KNOWS?
The WPA according to Kives' article in the FreeP today, selling this parkade would reduce the WPA's "artificial debt?" What in the fuck does that mean? Can't they use all the money they collected from all the poor fucks who put their money into the machines on saturdays to make a down payment or something?
Who's complaining about the price of parking? Surely A DOLLAR AN HOUR on a downtown street is reasonable? And where are these people who complain they can't find parking? When you can park on Portage Avenue a few blocks from Main Street during the day, there is no fucking parking shortage. What, are people only complaining about the rapeage occurring at the Civic Parkade? WHO PAYS TO PARK THERE ANYWAYS?!
Yeah and lastly, this little blurb on the inside of the cover of the Manitoban just flipped my switch on parking. Really? No parking on campus? You have a pass and you can't park? What do you expect, when the University gets a few more students every year? Why do you people think the price of a parking pass at the U of M has jumped almost 200 bucks in 5 years? Parking is a premium, there's no longer enough spots for all the students and the University can't make more parking lots. Do students stop using their brains outside of classes or what?
The U of M accommodates a hell of a lot of people. Tell me please, somebody, how that translates into not being able to accommodate Bomber fans? Poor Asper, he has to deal with a lot of BS on this one.
In conclusion, I have clearly demonstrated there is some kind of Minister of Parking who is responsible for all of the parking decisions that happen in this city. Nobody knows who put parking metres up, nobody knows who said it was okay to charge for parking on saturday, nobody knows who told who. Nobody. It's a mystery. It's not the councillors, they don't even know!
The Epic saga of the Minster of Parking continues.
I'd like just one day without news of some parking thing....
Let's look at the long, long, loooong list of W-T-F's with regards to parking that have come up in, oh, I'm not sure, the last year or so?
1. City? (This will be a theme, I'm telling you right now) decides there is not enough parking downtown. Allows demolition of otherwise decent buildings for construction of brand new parkades.
2. Despite the apparent more-than-high demand for parking downtown, they are considering selling a parkade. Who will get this parkade and what they will do with it, is unknown. However, if parking is in more-than-high demand, there should be a lineup of businesspeoples waiting to buy it and pour money in to fix it, shouldn't there? There's money in them-thar' parkin' garages.
3. Winnipeg Parking Authority? Arbitrarily places parking metres all over the fuckin place.
4. WPA? Changes parking hours in strange locations and charges for saturday parking. Winnipeg collectively mutters "...you bastards."
5. The City? Cries and cries about lack of parking downtown. People? complain about lack of parking downtown.
6. People? Complain about the price of parking in Winnipeg. Combined with the City's? claim there is high demand and low supply, Ontario firm moves in to aquirre a parkade in anticipation of capitalizing on a potentially growing parking market.
7. Pie-in-the-sky idea for apartments at the Forks is floated. Graham at Progressive Winnipeg likes this idea. Winnipeg cries foul en masse, wherever will we park?!
8. David Asper announces Stadium Plan at the U of M. Winnipeg cries foul, wherever will we park?!
9. University students complain about lack of parking in last week's Manitoban. The University must do more! Conveniently and ignorantly omitting the fact that more and more students are enrolled every year, invariably, there will be more student vehicles on campus every year. No shit, Sherlock.
10. Winnipeg is without a world-class parking structure. No WONDER we have parking issues.
* * *
Now....seriously. The "?"'s I placed are indeed, just that, ???
WHO decided there wasn't enough parking downtown? I haven't heard any reports, some councillors seem hell-bent on ensuring every single building downtown gets knocked down for a parkade. WHO decided? Nobody will admit to it. Where did this mantra come from exactly? It's like urban myth. You think people in Scotland really believe there's a Loch Ness?
Did the WPA really give the go-ahead to put up all those new parking metres? WHO decided to do that? Nobody knows! Is there a GHOST somewhere in the beauracracy or what? Is there a Minister of Parking in this city nobody knows about?
Since everybody complains about parking downtown, it MUST be true. Therefore we should welcome with open arms, new parking metres and parkades, right?
Except that we don't. That much is blatantly obvious. The best example? Saturday parking. WHO decided to do that? Oh, "they" ran out of proper signage, did they? Well WHO DECIDED it was okay? NOBODY KNOWS! WHO decided it was okay to collect money for saturdays? WHERE did this money go? How come NOBODY KNOWS?
The WPA according to Kives' article in the FreeP today, selling this parkade would reduce the WPA's "artificial debt?" What in the fuck does that mean? Can't they use all the money they collected from all the poor fucks who put their money into the machines on saturdays to make a down payment or something?
Who's complaining about the price of parking? Surely A DOLLAR AN HOUR on a downtown street is reasonable? And where are these people who complain they can't find parking? When you can park on Portage Avenue a few blocks from Main Street during the day, there is no fucking parking shortage. What, are people only complaining about the rapeage occurring at the Civic Parkade? WHO PAYS TO PARK THERE ANYWAYS?!
Yeah and lastly, this little blurb on the inside of the cover of the Manitoban just flipped my switch on parking. Really? No parking on campus? You have a pass and you can't park? What do you expect, when the University gets a few more students every year? Why do you people think the price of a parking pass at the U of M has jumped almost 200 bucks in 5 years? Parking is a premium, there's no longer enough spots for all the students and the University can't make more parking lots. Do students stop using their brains outside of classes or what?
The U of M accommodates a hell of a lot of people. Tell me please, somebody, how that translates into not being able to accommodate Bomber fans? Poor Asper, he has to deal with a lot of BS on this one.
In conclusion, I have clearly demonstrated there is some kind of Minister of Parking who is responsible for all of the parking decisions that happen in this city. Nobody knows who put parking metres up, nobody knows who said it was okay to charge for parking on saturday, nobody knows who told who. Nobody. It's a mystery. It's not the councillors, they don't even know!
The Epic saga of the Minster of Parking continues.
I'd like just one day without news of some parking thing....
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